The Practice of Loving-Kindness

I found the meditation practice of living-kindness to really open my mind; to become aware of people near to me, people far from me. These people are friends, family, co-workers, fellow-learners, and strangers. On a daily basis, I consider myself as to the events in my life, what is happening with me right now and so forth. Rarely do I have a quiet moment to truly consider those around me and those whom I do not even know.

This practice took me to a place I have never consciously went before. It the beginning, it was somewhat tough to pay attention to the instructions when I heard the sound of waves in the background. All I could think of at that point was previous visits to the beach and was unable to focus on the task.

Another road-block I experienced was when I was asked to shift my thoughts to the feelings and images that move in and out of my awareness, especially those that are disturbing. When asked to give equal amounts of love, kindness, care, it was almost impossible. Thoughts of negative self-images can flooding in and frankly this overwhelmed me. I was not able to begin to successfully complete this small section of the meditation. I feel as if I am too hard on myself and find it impossible to give that kind of attention to the insecurities I hold. I have to learn to open up and extend that kindness to myself that I give to others.

The mood and focus changed as the directions to extend care, love and kindness to other came into play. This part for me felt wonderful. I was able to think specifically about a loved one who has been having a lot of trouble in their life and I felt as if I were helping someone by doing this. I felt that I was really taking some of their pain by breathing it in, allowing it to dissolve, and then breathing-out love to that person. During the next minute or so, I thought of things that I could do specifically for this person; they were small gestures that would go a long way.

Another aspect of this meditation that I found to be a new and wonderful experience was including a circle of strangers and breathe in their suffering. My mind immediately went to a woman who has been known to walk around the city in which I live for more than 20 years now. She suffers from multiple psychological disorders (specifically schizophrenia) and pretty much everyone in town knows her. The temperature was 7 degrees tonight and I saw her walking. She will not accept rides because she likes the walks, but I did include her in this practice. I do not know what she needs, but I will include her again and again and perhaps will eventually discover an answer.

I would definitely recommend this practice to others as it helps to remove self-centeredness as suggested by Dacher in the text. To me, that is often the root to our troubles. I am a firm believer in that you get what you give. Not that you give to receive, just simply as I stated it. Giving does not indicate material because there are things far more important. Not only does this help remove self-centeredness,  but it helps me to consider and be sensitive to the needs of others. If helps me to provide sympathy and empathy and know that you cannot judge a book by its cover. We all have struggles of some sort and you never know what another person is experiencing behind the curtains. This practice encourages me to be kind to other. I will have to learn to extend this same practice to myself.

A mental work-out is just as it is appears. It is important to keep the mind sharp and healthy. Learning that our minds are not stuck just as they are is good news; plasticity is the key here. We can workout the mind just as we do our muscles. Making time each day for meditation and other practices, can change the way we look at or approach people, places, things.